my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
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I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
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So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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