I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
