More tranny stories later!
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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