Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
