if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
