I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
