dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
