All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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