it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!