school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
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