physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize
