Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Sorry my hands just texted you
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
