I don't think brook has ever known best
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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