You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize
