my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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