Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Randomize
