sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
