I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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