Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
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