i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
