An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
