return my video game
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I enjoy the company of your penis
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize