omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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