Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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