He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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