you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
