The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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