im having a threesome with these popsicles
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
