was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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