btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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