well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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