If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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