Do you still have your period?
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
