K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
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