): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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