This girl is more easily done than said...
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
