How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
