Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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