It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize