Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
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