yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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