i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize