Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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