he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Too much gin, very little bucket
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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