She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I believe in your delicious
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
