sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
