I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize