After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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