Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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