apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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